Myth? I think not but for all you misbelievers check out this new movie…
Myth? I think not but for all you misbelievers check out this new movie…
* I read this and had to repost it… pretty interesting. *
10 Ways to Last Longer in Bed (MensHealth Magazine)
The average guy lasts only 5 to 10 minutes during sex, and 71 percent of men want better sexual endurance. Use these strategies and ye shall, ahem, overcome.
1. Master Masturbation
Masturbate with a woman’s orgasm in mind, not your own. In other words, take your time: Work up to 15 minutes. Bring yourself close to the point of no return, but don’t let yourself ejaculate until time is up.
If you’re overheating during sex, stop and squeeze right below the head of your penis, focusing the pressure on the urethra—the tube running along the underside of the penis. This pushes blood out of the penis and momentarily represses the ejaculatory response.
3. Pinpoint Ejaculatory Inevitability
The process of sexual response has four phases: excitement, plateau, orgasm, and resolution. The trick is to recognize the spectrum of feelings throughout the process. Rate your sexual excitement on a scale of 1 to 10. Try keeping yourself at 7.
4. Better-Sex Workout
A Kegel is an exercise that helps tighten muscles responsible for ejaculatory control. Become familiar with them by cutting off the flow of urine and then starting and stopping it repeatedly. Once you have the exercise down, practice your Kegels anywhere: at your desk, behind the wheel. Tighten your muscles and hold for a count of 10, then release.
5. Press, Don’t Thrust
Press the end of your penis into her clitoral head. Linger in her vaginal entrance, where the most sensitive nerve endings are. When you do have intercourse, focus on small, shallow movements that penetrate the first 2 to 3 inches of her vagina.
6. Show a Little Courtesy
Ladies first, gentlemen—and we’re talking about more than just holding the door open. When you help her have an orgasm first, it relieves you of some of the pressure to please and the psychological anxiety that feeds into PE.
7. Ask Your Doctor About Prozac
A recent study showed that 73 percent of men who suffered from premature ejaculation either were cured or improved after taking 20 milligrams of Prozac a day for a week and 40 mg thereafter.
8. Go for a Second Round
Shrug off an early emission with some extra attention to her arousal (yes, it means staying awake), then getting back in the saddle. Most men last much longer the second time around. And the more you practice, the longer that first time will last.
9. Let Her Climb On
When she’s on top, your penis is less stimulated. And ask her to go slowly—long and fast thrusting is hazardous to a man’s endurance.
10. Stop Thinking of Your Orgasm
The area of the brain responsible for triggering orgasm is engaged whether you’re trying to have one or halt one. The more attention you give it, the more likely it is to arrive. Focus on what’s happening now—her silky thighs on your hips, say—and you’ll diffuse pleasure throughout your whole body.
Q: I am a young(20-30yrs. old) woman and I have always had a strong or high sex drive. I haven’t had that many lovers so I have masterbated a lot and have enjoyed using vibrators, dildo’s, and anal devices. I now enjoy anal sex as much as I do vaginal sex. The problem is my current boyfriend seems intimidated by my toys and is not interested in playing with my butt. What can I do make him more comfortable or will I have to masterbate to play with my ass?
A: Good question. I hate to pull out the “C” word so early in my answer but your situation can be greatly improved by having good, specific, sexual dialog with your boyfriend. If you really really enjoy different types of sex and he is extremely close-minded and conservative… well you might want to move on. If you feel you can work with him then I would recommend the following:
Spend time just lying on the bed or sofa, no tv or radio, and get him talking about his and your fantasies. This should include areas of the body important to you during sex and how you like to be stimulated. Find out what makes him tick also and take frequent trips together to your neighborhood adult novelty shop. Explore together all the things you can bring into this experience to make it more satisfying for both. It’s a matter of being familiar and comfortable with different toys and types of sex. I would also add for anal play try to always douche several times before play to keep it clean, and always wash a toy/finger/cock that has been in your ass before you allow it in your pussy. That’s how many a yeast infection occurs.
Sexy clothes or outfits, incense, video’s, and lighting are also ways to increase the pleasure of the experience. Start off slow if you have to but time and a lot of pleaser/stimulation/orgasms usually does the trick. Pretty soon he will be bending you over in the kitchen and you will have created a monster… a good monster, but a monster all the same.
Q: I am dating this girl and for the most part we get along great together but sometimes she likes to sexualy wind me up only to later, when I try to take it to the next level, she says “The best things are worth waiting for…”. Is this cool or should I be upset? Confused? Frustrated!
A: Dear Frustrated, what your experiencing is a woman exercising what we like to call in the social scene as “Pussy Control”. Yes, just like the song by Prince, it is an age old method for women to manipulate and try to even the odds with men. Looking at women’s long standing disposition in society, it is understandable that women learned to use their “wear’s” a long time ago. Times have changed significantly but with the advancement of women’s independance, birth control, and old habbits dying hard… you still find a few out there playing bait and switch. You basically have three options:
1. Tolerate her with care and time and hopefully she will become more devoted to you and use less manipulation.
2. Play the game but be willing to bet it all or walk away. Calling a women’s bluff is only as good as she is to sucome to you fronting her up. Straight up manipulation is not cool either way and doesn’t lend itself to a long, happy relationship.
3. Flat out tell her you don’t appreciate the manipulation or frustration. Teasing under foreplay is one thing and blue balling a man is another. If by confronting her with her behavior you don’t get her to admit or begin to understand, then it’s time for her to hit the brick’s!
Sorry ladies, but if your with a good guy then he doesn’t desereve this type of treatment. If your not with a good guy then…. hello! Either way a healthy sexual relationship strives off of mutual respect, being committed to please your partner, an open mind, and lot’s and lot’s of really good communication. (What each likes in different moods, how to acknowledge those other moods, and what each person has as their limit or sacred ground never to be crossed.)
Note: If a woman is emotionally and physically attracted to a man she may find herself battling between giving in and waiting for the right moment. The man may be completely unaware of this and loose interest.
Good Luck :-D
Q: My boyfriend seems only interested in sex for short periods of time, usually ended by his orgasm. What can I say or do to make this better or should I just get him replaced? Thanks - “unsatisfied”
A: This is not the first time I have heard this complaint from women about their lovers/boyfriends/husbands. The honest truth is they have to give a shit whether your pleased/satisfied as much or more than they care about themselves. If the capacity is there but the switch has never been turned on, so to speak, there are a few things I might suggest.
First, Women are capable of multiple orgasms and men usually aren’t. Combine this with the fact that most men chemically loose interest sexually after they orgasm, sometimes for a few minutes and sometimes for the evening. With these factors in mind it is important that the woman’s needs are addressed (orgasm) before the man’s. To achieve this a woman should use verbal positive reinforcement to the man when he does the right things to make her feel good. It will bolster his ego and keep his attention on the her instead of himself. DON’T hold back, really express your extreme satisfaction when he hits the right spots the right way. Once the woman has orgasmed a few times she can then turn her attention to the male with the charisma only sexual satisfaction can provide. The female should continue to express her attraction and satisfaction to the male and to put it mildly it probably won’t take long at this point.
The facts are you’ve successfully expressed your desires and happiness to your lover. In turn he should be really worked up by this point and probably won’t take long to climax. By sincerely expressing your pleasure and satisfaction from his efforts and rearranging the order of who orgasms first you both win. Men want to feel like a competent lover and women want to be satisfied so this achieves both.
Be careful not to make it obvious or he will feel manipulated. In good sex comes good communication and the ability for both people to take direction from the other. This is sex not ESP so talk sexy, be expressive, and it will almost always go a very long way.
Example: Letting your man know how much it turns you on when he kisses on your vagina hours before you have the freedom to take advantage of each other is planting the seed from which a tree will quickly grow. It’s a form of foreplay and will be on his mind pretty much up until he gets you alone and can put his thoughts into action. Hope this helps.
Q: Is there any truth to the comment: “If a person is a good kisser and a good dancer on the dance floor, does that mean their good in bed?”
A: This is actually a belief shared more by the female population than the male. The short and quick answer is that with these two elements in effect there is still no guarentee of performance or satisfaction. It doesn’t mean that this person is going to meet all your needs in bed and then some. That being said, there are some values associated with these abilities that do add merit to the question. From personal experience if someone is a good dancer… meaning they “let go” on the dance floor, envelope the music around them, and become sensually expressive with their body and motions, then this lends itself to them being intouch with there sensuality and sexuality. That means the probability of this person being more comfortable and expressive in bed is higher than normal.
As for the kissing part, well what is a good kisser? What is valued by one may not be that important or exciting to another. With personal taste and all the variations that entails I will attempt to keep it simple. When you kiss that other person… do you feel their passion run through them and into you by this act? Is it sensual, intamite, and erotic? Does it make you get goose bumps and weak in the knees? Then again from personal experience and those other experiences shared with me this usually stems from a person who is passionate and expressive. These are two valuable qualities in the bedroom.
So in closing if a person is a good kisser and can dance seductively, it usually lends itself to very positive attributes in the bedroom but does not guarentee. Breaking it down… probably yes but not definately yes.
Enjoy and happy hunting/searching/exploring. :-)
Q: The question a lot of men hate and women fib about more times then not is “Does penis size matter? If so, to what degree?
A: The classic age old answer to this is “It’s not the size of the fish, but the motion in the ocean” that makes the experience. Is this accurate and is this true?
Men’s penises come in all different sizes and few different shapes. Some are hung like a horse while others can only wonder if his has any impact on the sexual experience? Well to be fair some women have large or deep vaginas, some with extensive labia and some without. Some woman’s clitorus just stares us in the face while others are withdrawn under the hood only to emerge during stimulation.
So where does this leave us in our quest to feel proud and happy about our genetalia? The answer is serveral things. Besides a persons personal interest physics come into play. It is simple really… small vagina with small penis probably not issue. Large vagina with a large penis is relatively the same thing. And then there is everything inbetween (all sizes between small and large).
Unfortunately a woman vagina can temorarily strech to accomidate a well hung man… at least to some degree. But the opposite is not true unless the woman exercises her vagina muscles and can provide that clamp down effect.
Another thing to point out is if your a man with an enormous penis you may find it an ongoing issue try to fit into women and/or not cause soreness or damage. If you have a large penis be patient and take baby steps to work up to some regular intercourse activity. The average size of a man’s penis is between 5.25 inches and 6 inches.If your much larger than this please try to be kind to your partner. If you fall way short of this size and feel inadeqate, then it’s time to incorporate some trick and help along the way. First it should be understood a side from the feeling of intimate connection by regular intercourse, you hands can be a tool to mark the ages. Although conceptionally it isn’t the two pieces (man and women) fitting together, but I can promise you with a little research and practice she might learn to prefer your hand over Mr. Handcock!
There are also toys like vibrators and dildo’s that can be instrumental in giving your partner that untimate orgasm. Don’t let your insecurities or ego get in the way, have an open popsitive mind and learn to experiment with your partner to find what suits each person best.
All that being said… sorry guys, size does matter and many many times i’ve had candid conversations with ex-girlfriends and they all said yes. Scientifically put if it’s larger it will cause more pressure on a woman’s vaginal walls and she will feel it a lot more.
Comprimising in the bedroom will make communication and the event itself better, so put your ego’s a side, learn new fun ways to please your partner, and for goodness sake don’t buy that crap on TV that states your manhood will grow. These suppliments work like weak viagra, they will make your penis larger due to increased blood flow but by no means make it grow larger than it’s natural maximum size.
Sorry to say but it’s like buying snake oil.
In closing if your not very well indowed forget your ego and take a trip down to your local adult “novelty shop”. Toys of all kind are fun and can seriously aid you in the total experience with your partner.
Accepting your sexuality and being “comfortable in your own skin”.
We are all unique and beautiful in our own way. Whether your tall, short, thin, or a few extra pounds today’s world has shown us there is someone out there for you. Realistically with today’s every rising populations odds have it there are a bunch of people out there for you. The key to great sex can also be the key to a happy life by accepting yourself for the beautiful “you” that you are and can be. Some people want to change their appearance either with exercise or surgery but in the end you must love and accept yourself. Once you can tap into your inner beauty you will glow and an unseen aura will surround you. With sex and intamacy this lends itself to feeling more comfortable with your partner, feeling free to feel beautiful and explore each other, and inhibitions will soon disappear replaced by waves of pleasure and communication you thought you could never experience. Be the best “you” you can be and then strive to accept and love who and what you are, it will make it much easier for others to do the same. Create a sacred atmosphere of trust, communication, and exploration for you and your partner. Soon you will begin to experience sex, love, and pleasure on new, much higher levels then you have ever experienced before!
Q: What is Sexual Compatibility and how do you know if it is genuine?
A: This topic can be very subjective and fall victim to the desires and trappings of each individual. I can only express what I believe to be my understanding of good compatibility in the bedroom.
1. Attraction: this should be both mental and physical shared by both.
2. Sense of selflessness; deriving pleasure not only in the gratification of being touched, but the act of satisfaction from giving pleasure to your partner.
3. Either having the same taste or direction in sex, or being open-minded in connecting on a similar path of desires and expectations.
4. Being invested in your partner and the moment; this means granting each other respect and privacy so that each person can feel comfortable enough to express themselves fully without regard for embarrassment or rejection.
5. Eye contact as well as skin contact is natural, easy, and completely desired. There are no “uncomfortable” moments only desire and pleasure.
6. Respect of each others boundaries and a clear understanding of limitations. Caring enough and being observant so that a firm “no” is never needed.
7. Creativity and spontaneity provided by both sides, this means it’s not always 50/50 but averages close to that over a given amount of time.
8. Understanding that every person has a “bedroom” face they wear only when mutually appropriate. This means not confusing boundaries due to lust or over-active desire.
9. Last but not least sexual communication is clear, concise, comfortable, and used frequently to let your lover know your moods, desires, and fantasies.
Valentines Day is one day a year where we get to lower our defenses, show affection and endearment, and possible dip our toe in the ever-engrossing pool of sex and love. If you have someone you find yourself keen on use this day to reach out with the mystical arms of romances enticement and firm your grip with the determination of a well focused lover. It is a beautiful day meant for sharing of feeling, interests, even lustful endevors. So enjoy, enjoy, enjoy! XOXOXO’s